9 Things I’ve Learned After 10 Years of Marriage

Screen Shot 2014-08-01 at 12.07.37 PM

I was married pretty young, right after high school graduation, I was 18. Now I’m 28 and just celebrated my 10 year wedding anniversary.

This is us on our honeymoon in Hawaii. Crazy young love!

Screen Shot 2014-08-07 at 3.14.44 PM

It’s kind of a big deal to me.

Here are a few things I have learned along the way.

1. Stick up for each other-stay positive

Seriously, you have to be on each other’s sides no matter who you’re around: family, friends, co-workers, etc.  Don’t put each other down, It can be something as simple as saying, “Yeah, he/she is getting pretty lazy, the house is always a mess, or he/she never helps put the kids to bed, etc….” Sure those things may be true, but work on them in your own time, together. Try to stay positive at all times. Bring up your concerns in private and find a solution together. Bashing each other won’t solve a darn thing! We’ve had our share of this and it’s a slippery slope. When you start to talk negative about each other, somehow you start believing it… and it can be hard to get back on track.

2. Keep yourself looking good

I am a firm believer in this. My husband knew this before we ever got married. I truly believe keeping yourself attractive and healthy can go along way. Yes, it’s hard, but Anything worth doing, is hard work.

Start small and just keep encouraging/supporting each other. You will feel so much better!

3.  Be involved-truly care

Whether it’s your kids athletics, a new job, a new hobby… be involved and care!  Go to the game, actively listen to each other, support new hobbies that make them happy. Just showing up doesn’t count, you have to be hands-on, you need to truly care. This helps makes connections within your family and brings everyone closer.

4. Have lots of [alone time]

It brings you closer. A strong marriage is the first step towards a strong family.

5. Eat dinner at the table

I love how we eat dinner as a family each night, not in front of a distracting TV, but at our kitchen table. We talk and laugh. We have discussions. It’s amazing. It is the one daily constant that I think our entire family enjoys. Besides, I like having a table to put my plate on while I eat 🙂 Dinnertime is more awesome at a table! And we believe our marriage/family is stronger for it.

6. Be grateful

Don’t forget to thank each other, or do something special every now and then. Whether it’s arranging a night out for a surprise, bring home their favorite flowers/candy bar, or even a back rub…. anything and everything is appreciated. It will keep you both smiling!

7. Keep jealousy at bay-trust each other

Just trust each other as best you can. If there is a reason you feel like you can’t, then talk about it, so you can move on and have a fun relationship without worry!  Keep each other happy and you shouldn’t have a problem with this one!

8. Paper, Rock , Scissors

This game has saved us from stupid arguments countless times!  Who’s turn to change the baby’s diaper, cook dinner, take out the trash, mop the floor, etc…. You can use it for anything — Seriously, try it!  We don’t use it as much as we did when we were first married, but it helped us out in those first few years, when maybe you need it most 🙂

9. Never give up on each other-no one is perfect, including you

Not many people know this, but we went through a rough patch during our 2nd/3rd year of marriage. Going back to #1, this is really the reason we probably had issues. We felt like giving up, throwing in the towel, but we didn’t. We got some help. We were in marriage counseling for almost 9 months. It didn’t seem to solve all our problems, but it was nice to talk-to put everything out there for the other to absorb. I really think it kept us together during such a hard time, it kept us from giving up on each other. If we wouldn’t have tried counseling it may have ended, or we may have stayed together, but had more unhappy times. It was the glue that held us together.

Don’t be scared to get help from someone, to talk to someone. It may be the lifesaver you need, even if it’s just buying you time to remember how much you really do care about that person.

On a side note: during our counseling, we were in a ‘I don’t really like that person anymore attitude.’ But we still had some good times, it wasn’t all bad. It was more like 50/50, but we both wanted it to be 100% happy again. And that’s what happened. When you want something bad enough, it will happen, don’t give up and TRY your best!

I am so happy. 

Marriage is a rollar coaster, full of highs, lows, twists and turns. You have to go with the flow, don’t be too serious, be light-hearted, laugh, have fun, and enjoy each other. Don’t give up so easily. Don’t take that other person for granted. Love them with all you have. Marriage is not 50-50, it is 100-100. You both must give 100% all the time to achieve the desired results. You must put in as much as you put out. And if you don’t like what you are seeing, then change it, don’t just give up on it. I promise it’s worth all that effort!

Screen Shot 2014-08-04 at 12.52.43 PMOur 10 year anniversary date!  We finally hit the mountain bike trails in NW AR for 2 hours and had a blast!!!!  Then we got our grub on at Billy Simm’s BBQ!

One Mile a Day

Around here, being active is what it’s all about.

We encourage each other to run, bike, swim, etc…. daily.

We go as a family with our 6 and 7 year old and run a mile, or ride the trails, or swim laps (actually, I don’t swim laps — not for me!)

We have been pretty regular on working out, but the last few weeks I’ve been thinking sometimes it’s just too hard to get in a long workout, or I just don’t feel like it, so I came up with a one mile mentality. One Mile. Each day. Minimum.

Screen Shot 2014-08-07 at 10.29.39 AM

Of course you can do more than one mile, that’s awesome, good for you, but for those days where you don’t feel well, or the day is jammed packed already… one mile is doable. It’s not much, but just enough.

It’s a great start for those who have trouble working out, or being motivated.

I wanted to challenge each of you to a mile a day. One mile. Walk, run, bike, whatever, just get up and move. Each day for one mile. You can do it.

You won’t regret it, and once you get the ball rolling, you will start to feel amazing and hopefully you will never stop. Maybe increasing your distance down the road. But don’t focus on that now, just focus on 1 mile. It could be a life changer.

1 mile a day. 7 miles a week. 30 miles a month. Imagine the awesomeness of accomplishing that.

Also, it is so much more fun to workout when you have an app like MapMyRun or RunKeeper to keep track of workouts. You feel good looking back on workouts, speed, calories burnt, etc. You can have friends and keep track of each other. Another neat feature are the challenges. You can win cool prizes for completing these.

My kids were 4 and 5 for this 3 mile walk in Houston. Kids need someone to show them the way to living an active and healthy lifestyle. Be their role model. Families that workout together, stick together :)

382782_234052089996970_2026470965_n

My Bucket List

1. Fly in an airplane

2. Fly in an airplane with my kids

3. Visit Washington D.C.

4. Travel and visit all 50 States with my children before they graduate, passing through does not count

5. Go on a cruise

6. Hold a wild animal (wolf and lion cub)

7. Really help someone in need

8. Own a successful business

9. Retire with a million dollars in the bank

10. Climb Mt. Kilimanjaro

11. Climb Mt. St. Helens

12. Visit each continent

13. Complete a century ride

14. Skydive

15. Go white water rafting

16. Go on a real safari photographing the wild

17. Visit the 7 natural wonders of the world

18. Visit the 7 natural wonders of the USA

19. Go to Disney World

20. Camp on the Beach

21. Ride Horseback somewhere absolutely beautiful

22. Watch a Chiefs game in every Stadium

Screen Shot 2014-07-24 at 8.46.39 AM

Listening to the wind

It’s 5pm. I’ve been lounging in our hammock for almost an hour. It’s amazing, I’m home, but it’s as good as a vacation.

It’s peaceful.

It’s calming.

It’s beautiful.

It’s relaxing.

It’s inspiring.

It’s one of the best feelings in the world.

To lay in a hammock and listen to the wind blow the leaves. 

I hope everyone has more time to do this, everyone deserves these days (probably more than they get).

Go buy a hammock and enjoy the wind.

*Note:  I take our hammock down after each use and store it inside so it stays perfect 🙂  I also wrote this post while in my hammock!

Processed with VSCOcam with c1 preset Processed with VSCOcam with c1 preset

A Day in My Shoes

Tuesday, June 10th

7AM Workout, I wanted to hurry, so I skipped the treadmill & worked out on a StairStep, it was awesome!  I did 115 floors in 20 min, it was the HILL setting, and burned 248 calories, then I pumped some iron. Mumford and Sons always helps me get through my workouts or Maroon 5 🙂

 

8AM Got home, put in a load of laundry and cleaned the kitchen (I even mopped!)

9AM Got the kids some breakfast and hopped in the shower!

10AM  Finished Miquon Math after breakfast then drove to the library for a Magic Show!

11AM  Magic Show — Turner was picked to go on stage, he thought it was cool!

11:30AM  Sonic break!

Processed with VSCOcam with f2 preset

12PM  School time, I helped the kids with their stuff for the day. Here is a run-down for today (they can do it in any order):  Miquon, Khan, Science, Reading, Keyboard practice, and Spanish.

2PM My sister called and wanted to meet up at the park, the kids loved feeding the fish and finally getting down the monkey bars!

Processed with VSCOcam with f2 preset 

4PM Got home and cleaned the fish tank, this is our 2nd Betta (I kinda killed the 1st one, oops!)

5PM-8PM Coaching at the ball field 🙂  We WON!  I really LOVE volunteer coaching.  It’s something I started about 2 years ago, and will continue for many years.

Processed with VSCOcam with c1 preset

——— Jason made dinner tonight while I was gone — he’s so great ———-

8PM Decided to watch Catching Fire before bed and snack on some Jalapeño popcorn

11PM Bed!

 

 

Meet Megan

I’m the one always on the go.  I encourage everyone to enter runs, races, compete (I love competition), and basically anything to get you moving and enjoying life.  We lived in Texas two years ago, and I got into cycling, bought myself a super sweet Scott carbon-fiber bike – on sale:) and have been waiting for the right moment to enter a race.  This year I think will be the year (if I actually get out there and start training)!  Other than loving the outdoors, traveling, and my family, I am your typical 28 year old wife of 10 years to a wonderful man, and mother to 2 AWESOME kids!

A few goals of mine are to ride my bike in RagBrai (across the state of Iowa), climb Mt. Kilimanjaro, and travel to all 50 states with my kids before they graduate.

407625_4341346086021_181034108_n